Giving To The Needy, Fasting...All One Big Show?

I wanted to share with you two very powerful Bible scriptures that I have come across a few times in my life, but most recently truly effected me. This isn't a religious blog, so like always, I will discuss a little on how one can apply it to their life regardless of who they believe in.

The scriptures are Matthew 6:1-6, 16-18

Matthew 6

Giving to the Needy
1"Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven.

2"Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. 3But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, 4so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.

Matthew 6:16-18


16"And when you fast, do not look gloomy like the hypocrites, for they disfigure their faces that their fasting may be seen by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. 17But when you fast, anoint your head and wash your face, 18that your fasting may not be seen by others but by your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.

Both of these scriptures remind me of how much as people we tailor our actions in order to please, be rewarded by, or for the attention of other humans. These scriptures really stand out during Lent season, a time where people are sacrificing, fasting, and working on their relationship with God. A lot of people have decided to fast simply because those around them are doing it, and they want to prove to others that they can be strong. They are totally not focusing on why they are fasting, but what they are fasting and displaying it for everyone to see. This is suppose to be a 40 day journey with you and God, not a spectacle for all to see.

During Lent it is also a time for service to others, but are you giving and doing service so that others applaud you, or are you doing it out of the kindness of your heart? Are you comfortable enough that you can do service in secret?

This scripture really speaks to Lent; however, it applies on a daily basis. Are you doing other things in your life "for the people", or for yourself? Do you simply do things to get attention and for others to praise you? Are you stuck trying to live up to expectations of other humans?

I think hands down really reading and understanding these two scriptures can help you put into perspective your reasoning behind the things you choose to do. I think it is important that you concentrate more on the actual goal you are trying to accomplish, and not who is watching. You will come to realize that who is watching holds little importance in the long run. Also, those who are watching can hold you back from what you are truly trying to achieve. Remember, people are not Gods whom we have to dedicate our lives to pleasing.

I am glad God is helping me to understand this...I fall short often.

-The Socialite


Lent Season...Tis the Season to Sacrifice

It is crazy how God has given us so much, and how we expect so much more, but we find it hard to sacrifice for only 40 days, or refuse to. For everyone who has decided to sacrifice something for these next 40 days, you are in my prayers. During Lent may you decrease, and he increase. May your relationship with God grow stronger. It is listening time! :)

If you aren't religious, during a random amount of days, you should still try giving up something. You might discover a lot about yourself. Sacrifice and discipline shows you strength you never knew you had; comfort keeps you blind to it, thus keeping you in the same place.

Think of Lent season as a time where you are going to an Island away from all of your normal distractions, allowing you to spend more time relaxing and focusing. For many that will be focusing more on their relationship with God. If you are not religious or spiritual, think of it as a time to discover more about yourself. :)

I am doing the Daniel Fast for Forty Days:

Click here to read more on the fast...

God Bless,

The Socialite


LIVE It Into Existence

People can end up spending their entire lives WISHING they could do all of the things they dreamed of. They sit around and picture the life they COULD live, but end up either taking forever to bring that picture to life, or never do. WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? Whatever you want out of life you have to LIVE it into existence.

You must wake up everyday and start living exactly how you wish to live. What does that mean crazy lady? How can you live something that hasn't come true yet? I will give you a few examples:

1. You want to be famous. So start acting like it! Put yourself out there. Increase your twitter and facebook presence, blog, vlog, etc.. There are tons of ways to start building a brand for yourself, and with technology you have no excuse on coming up with ways to get your talent out there. Wake up everyday and do one thing that gets 10 more people to know who you are. That is a very small goal for someone who wishes that millions of people will know who they are. Are you waiting for them to discover you? Noooo make them discover you.

2. You want to be married. Start acting like a wife!! Make a goal to make a new dish every week. Stop partying every moment you get. Start hanging out in spots where you can meet guys that share your interest. Start working on your patience in dealing with another person. Test it in as many ways as you can. You have to start training for the perfect wife position now...not later. AND stop stop saying you will never find a man. You never will because you are putting that energy out there.

3. You want to save the world. So at what point do you think that can start happening? Do you think you have to be Oprah with millions of dollars to do so? How selfish of you to say you want to save the world, but you want to wait until someone saves you by giving you success first. START TODAY! Every week come up with one way to give back. Sign up to volunteer somewhere. Save the world one person at a time through small ways...

The point is that unless you start living out your dreams today, tomorrow will continue to seem so far away. Why do we chase our dreams instead of just grabbing them by the neck? Why don't we just claim whoever we want to be right now?

Ill start: I want to become known for helping people live their best lives just like Oprah, in as many ways as I can. To tell you the truth I have no clue what way will bring me the success I want, but all I know is below is how I have started:

1. I blog and share my life lessons with people.
2. I write for other blogs increasing my presence to more people.
3. I tweet inspirational messages and work to increase my followers everyday.
4. I mentor for young girls every Saturday, and even took on a leadership position as volunteer coordinator to increase the amount of work I do to help.
5. I remain happy and strong as often as I can so that I can hopefully pass my energy on to someone else.

These small things bring me one step closer to becoming the person I want to be known for. What are you waiting for?

-The Socialite


5 Reasons Women Should Slow Down When Dating

Check out my 1st published article on

"5 Reasons Women Should Slow Down When Dating"

Woman are always in a rush to declare someone their “man” or “boyfriend”. After a few dates, we quickly determine that the guy has everything we are looking for, and immediately go on a mission to make things official. Why are we in a rush?

Could it be that once we meet a guy and think he’s one of the “good ones” we have to lock him down first before someone else does? Is it out of fear that we might not run across another “good one” again? Do we think it is the only way to get them to be exclusive with us? I know what it is, we can’t wait to become official so we can declare to every other woman that “HE IS MINE”. Maybe we simply don’t want to be alone.

If the answer is yes to any of the above questions or statements, then we are seeking titles for the wrong reasons and maybe way too fast.

What would happen if we stopped trying to quickly give our “relationships” titles, and we spent more time getting to know the person and having fun?

More often men date with no real expectations at first, so it allows them to simply have fun getting to know the person or just enjoying the moments in general. Women on the other hand want to make someone their boyfriend or man so fast, that they are no longer even concentrating on the person. It is like they determine as much information as they need to know on the first date, and he is already “the one”.

Click here for the link to the original article and the 5 reasons you should slow down:


GirlTalkLeaks: Purpose

ShyahD: So I think I'm at a crossroad re: my career (dramatic but serious). Do you think there's a direct correlation between your purpose in life and your career?

The Socialite: I think everybody dreams of connecting their purpose in life and their career. It is a dream come true to wake up and feel as if you are fulfilling your life purpose and getting paid to do so. While I think that there are some people who are living out their purpose through their careers, there are many people that may never be able to connect the two depending on what their purpose is. I don't think that everyone can. If you feel your purpose is helping kids then maybe you can be a teacher, but what if what you think your purpose is doesn't translate into a specific career? I guess that leads to the question, is passion the same thing as purpose? I think that without a doubt you should connect passion to your career.

ShyahD: I don’t think passion and purpose are necessarily the same; I do believe there will be passion in the purpose. We can have many interest and many things we're passionate about, but your purpose is that gravitation, that force, the thing you do without thinking, the thing that works out effortlessly, because it's in the will of a higher power. While many never tap into their purpose, there are some fortunate enough to eventually find a way to bring everything together. They’re able to marry the passion and career to the purpose. I was thinking about this last night because I'm passionate about so many different things, but they aren't all correlated. I want to find the common denominator that links it all.

The Socialite: The interesting thing is that we are apart of a generation who wants to embrace every aspect of our purpose, combined with passions and make money at the same time. Generations before us didn't really have the means or the opportunities to sit back and discover their true callings. They had to do what made them the most money to support their families and many times their passions and small hobbies were brushed under the rug.

We have an advantage as a generation to truly embrace what makes us happy and to fulfill our life purpose in the right ways, but it is a gift and a curse. The above is the gift, but the curse is that it leaves us confused. I don't how many people I have talked to our age who aren’t a little confused about what it is they are suppose to be doing in life. As a result, everyone feels like they are behind or they feel all over the place as they jump from opportunity to opportunity, never truly building a career in any field or area.

I sit around everyday either praying, meditating, or simply talking to God, trying to figure out how to make my passions into a career. The crazy thing is, like most people these days, I have so many passions but I don't know how they translate into a career. I know one of my biggest passions is helping the youth like you, but I am not ashamed to say that I also want to be successful financially and I know there is very few dollars behind work like that. I am so lost at times...sigh.

ShyahD: I was having a discussion about passion/purpose awhile ago with one of my mentors and he mentioned that sometimes people try to focus in too narrowly on their purpose. He said it should be general but specific to you, similar to a company's mission statement. So your purpose in life can be ‘to positively motivate and inspire young people’. Therefore, everything you do in life should someway positively motivate and/or inspire youth whether your a teacher, author, marketing director, whatever it may be, your work should reflect your purpose. I thought it made a lot of sense and it helps to give your life direction. Before I embark on anything I ask myself why?(am I doing this) and how?(does it align with my life goal/ purpose)

The Socialite: I love that! I think that we all (this includes our readers ) should sit down and think about our life mission statement. It would be a good idea to also write it out and maybe even hang it on your wall. After you know your life Mission Statement you then try to figure out what you are passionate about and how to turn that into a career, hobby, or volunteer opportunity, all while making sure it goes a long with your mission statement. One thing that I am starting to come to terms with is not being afraid to take on an opportunity or do work that you might not be so passionate about to survive financially, but at the same time understanding that while you are working at this "job" that you can always work on your passions on the side, and at any moment it can lead to a career. Also, not being afraid that it will be too late to start the career of your dreams. It is never too late as long as you continue to embrace your passions everyday. Eventually if you are working at them hard enough something amazing will come out of it.

ShyahD: Writing out your mission statement, hanging it up, sending yourself weekly reminders, all that is necessary to keep us centered and balanced. Another thing I believe is we are already living out our purpose, whether we realize it or not. That's why I loved your idea of the Basket List. We have these unique connections and experiences for a reason. There's a reason I went to Howard University and there's a reason I joined Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc. I believe all these small things will come full circle. They're all small pieces to that big picture. So remember what you accomplished, reflecting on these unique experience can aid in identifying future opportunities that can take you to that next level, whatever that next level may be.

The Socialite: Agreed! Basket list, mission statement, bucket list, praying, meditating, all these things simply mean that you are taking time out of your day to focus in on what you really are here for. I think if people take at least a few hours out of the day to focus on their passions, either by doing one of the above things or actually carrying out the passion, you will move a lot faster towards connecting purpose with passion, and actually carrying them out. Most of the time people become so frustrated with connecting everything that they just push it all away and give up, and then regret so many things later on in their life or they’re never truly happy with what they are doing. I say carrying out and focusing on your passions start today, whether it be in a big way or small, and most importantly make sure that while you are focusing on your passions that you don't focus on what everybody else has to say. We live in a society that pushes success and so many people are watching and criticizing that we lose focus on what makes us happy and instead we try to make others happy.

ShyahD: Couldn't have said it better!!! Society also defines success by material possessions. It would be unfortunate to reach the end of life with fancy toys, but never identifying your purpose. I think purpose, passion and career can all be directly associated. Embracing your individuality will bring you closer to finding and embracing the correlation between the three.
e three.

-The Socialite and ShyahD

Stay tuned for more leaks from inside Girl Talk!


CashKyle - "I Did It Again" (Prod by PaBO Put-A-BeatOn®)

Check out the song "I Did It Again" by this dope kid from Philly. I feel as if tons of guys can relate to the concept of cheating in a relationship, but the girl taking them back. I love the mellow feel to this song.

For more songs from CashKyle:


Wale - The Breakup Song (Extended Version) Howard University!

Here is the extended version of the video in the last post. This extended version really shows the "500 Days of Summer" concept from beginning to end. Again Howard University Stand Up!

Wale - The Breakup Song (Extended Version) from Walu M on Vimeo.


Copyright © 2008 - Keeping up with the Huxtables - is proudly powered by Blogger Smashing Magazine - Design Disease - Blog and Web - Dilectio Blogger Template - edited by Norell Alesse at Batch! Please